Thursday, October 13, 2005
the devil made me do it
Ok, I know it seems like I have abandoned this blog but nothing could be further from the truth. It's just that I have moved to Israel for 5 months and getting to the internet is not as easy as it once was. I will share with you a dream that has been clearly influenced by my activities here in Israel..

The dream was about people that I am in a program with right now in Israel. In this dream the main group leader of this program appeared as a somewhat shady character, evil even. I couldn't put my finger on it, but I knew something was odd about him.

He was trying to convince me that he could take me to a "new level" of life, that he knew a new way to live and that this way of life was amazing beyond anything I could ever imagine. He told me that people who have chosen this path have known new happiness, wealth and freedom. The catch? I would have to commit suicide in order to "cross over".

He assured me that I wasn't really dying, but that I would immediately be reborn into this life he spoke of. He showed me clips (using a tv or did it just flash in my mind??) of others who had gone through this process. In the clip he showed me a man in a business suit entered a bank and walked up to an automated bank machine to take money out. Somehow he was able to swipe this "magic" bankcard and was able to take out as much money as he wanted. This leader (or is he the devil?) told me that the man had chosen to pretend that he was still going to work everyday so his wife wouldn't know, all the while he would go about doing whatever he wanted to during the day, happy as a clam, and still bring home plenty of money to support the wife and family. In fact his life was improved because he had the freedom of doing what he wanted during the day without having to answer to anyone and then he could go home feeling happy and content and be wholly present with his family because he wasn't exhausted from a hard day's work. This devil-man assured me this had drastically improved the life of this man as well as the lives of his family members.

Things got sketchy in the dream after this.. there were parts in which I was standing on the edge of a cliff trying to coax myself to jump so I could begin my new life, but was unable. At one point a classmate of mine in the program walked by and began talking to me. He seemed strangely happy, almost as if he was on a drug of some sort. It seemed fake and unnatural, like he had been brainwashed. I asked him if he had taken the leap (so to speak!) and gone through the process with this program leader of ours and he said that he had. I asked him to tell me what really happens when you get to the other side, do you die and what it's really all about. He just gave me a sly smile and said that he couldn't tell me. I asked again, pleading for him to just tell me already... we were friends and program peers, couldn't he just tell me?? Still he said that he could not tell me and that I would just have to find out for myself. He then walked away, leaving me standing on the edge of the cliff, wind blowing in my face and clothes rippling and flapping in the breeze...

In the next flash I was standing at a bank machine with a special bankcard in my hand. I glanced nervously around me as I readied myself to try it for the first time. Would I be caught taking out all this money that's not mine? I was scared. I waved the card over the screen (?? Fancy!) and a welcome message appeared on the screen. When I attempted to enter in a PIN however, an error message came up and said I could not take any money out at this time. What the hell??, I thought and tried again. Time after time I was declined and I began to get angry. Had I just been suckered? Then, on a screen below the bank machine screen, I saw a news report (there's a tv screen under the ATM screen?? What kind of bank is this?? Hahaha... gotta love dreams!) and in the news report I saw footage of yet another classmate of mine from the program. The footage seemed to be taken by a security camera that was over a walkway/path in a park somewhere, at night. My classmate was whooping, hollering, dancing and skipping along in this security footage. Had he gone mad?? The report went on to suggest that this man in the footage had been taking money illegally from all kinds of bank machines across the city and that in fact, reports were coming in from all over that similar such incidents were taking place.

Suddenly I was scared. The jig was up and I had better get out of the bank before I got caught! But then a much more frightening realization came to me... Had I just traded my soul to the devil and got nothing in return?

Only bits and pieces of other dreams...

In this dream I was part of the crew of the starship Enterprise, with Captain Jean-Luc Picard leading us. We had been boarded by the Borg and they were taking over the ship at a rapid rate. I was part of a small group (including the captain) that had escaped the initial onslaught and was hiding in a cargo hold in some out of the way place on the ship. Picard was working feverishly on a way to keep the Borg at bay when he and another crewman finally came up with a way of putting up a force field over the doorway to the area we were in. Feeling really quite pleased with himself Picard stepped back, smiling and looking at his force field, and said "There! That should hold them off for a while!" Just then someone came right through the force field, no CARTWHEELED through the force field, and stopped in front of us. The group was stunned as it stared at the figure standing before them, when the captain exclaimed "My god, it's Mystique!".

For those who don't know who that is, Mystique is a villainess from the X-Men comics, and more specifically, the Mystique in my dream was the one from the X-Men movie. I can't explain how the two worlds collided like that, but there ya have it. I woke up from the sheer fright of our impending doom.

In another dream I had run into and met Gwen Stefani. I was just a bumbling fan saying stupid stuff like "I really like that Bananas song!" or "I really think you're cool an' stuff!". She just politely smiled at me and said nothing and eventually the sting of embarrassment actually woke me up. I completely attribute the dream to the fact that the night before a couple of friends and mine heard "that Bananas song" come on the radio and we totally cranked it up and sang and danced along.

I also had my first dream about my beloved cat Abby since she died a month ago. In the dream I thought I saw her sitting under a table somewhere. I rubbed my eyes and thought... that can't be her, she's dead! Or is she? Could it be possible that maybe she's alive? I recalled in my dream that my mother told me my brother was having problems dealing with our cats' death and that he had imagined seeing her when she wasn't really there... could that be happening to me, I wondered? I rushed to go around the table to see her on the other side, but when I got there it was some other cat I wasn't familiar with. Heartbroken I realized I too had imagined seeing her.

Rest in peace my dear sweet Abby, you are loved and missed. It was an honour to share my life with you for 17 years.